Wednesday, May 23, 2012


The theme this week is surely meant to reveal bittersweet memories of heartaches past. And I, in keeping with my character, must be contrary.

But first...a shameless plug.

As a part of a very full summer-long program designed to support THE BIG READ--which is spotlighting Edgar Allen Poe this year--the Massillion Museum is hosting myself and two other authors this Saturday, May 26th, 2012, 2-4 pm.

Horror Writing Workshop 
Backlist Books, 39 Lincoln Way East, Massillon, OH 44646 
Join published writers in FREE workshop to develop your own writing. Share in their experiences and explore their specific genres in the realm of horror and fantasy.

I will be joined by the awesome duo of LUCY SNYDER (Author of Spellbent, Shotgun Sorceress, and Switchblade Goddess as well as much more; and GARY BRAUNBECK (author of In Silent Graves and --nominated for the Horror Writer's Association's coveted Bram Stoker Award for Superior Achievement in the Novel-- The Indifference of Heaven, and much much more ;  If you are in the area, come out and see us!

Back to the topic, now...

Not that it is my intention to be contrary, but as I consider what fodder my life has provided me for "the one who got away" tales, I'm forced to traverse the oft treacherous path of self discovery.


Not to be boastful or self-applauding, but I'm rather inclined to think that way more often than not, I  am the one who got away. Fellas just can't seem to hold on to me. In nearly every relationship I've had, or tried to have, I am the one who walked away from it. I left a four year relationship last summer because of a handful of issues, not the least of which, were commitment oriented. I figure four years is long enough to wait for that "next step." So my next steps were away. I bought my own house, packed all my stuff into a huge rented truck, and was gone.

But my departures have not always been about commitment. I left a lying cheat. I left the 'you will do/think/believe what I tell you to' fella. I left the never-gonna-grow-up guy, too. So I can't say I keep picking the same kind of 'wrong' man.

I endeavor to make fresh, new mistakes when I make them.

So, is it a fairy tale, the existence of a man who

  • is willing to commit and be faithful to the right woman 
  • won't try to tell a woman what to do/think/believe 
  • understands that sharing is part giving and part taking 
  • is generally happy, likes to laugh, and is employed 
  • isn't intimidated by a smart woman who is successful
  • is secure enough in himself to not have jealousy issues
  • can readily accept a woman as-is if she has trouble obeying the speed limit, geeks out over Star Trek; reads Tarot cards; writes novels about vampires and werewolves; AND plays a mean, rockin' guitar.
I have to believe that 'he' is not a fairy tale. He's just, apparently, hiding under a rock in Alaska. :-)

What do you think, ladies/gents? 
Would I have a better chance at finding Bigfoot, Nessie or the Chupacabra?


  1. Oh man, I totally hear ya on this one. I had a long habit of picking the totally wrong man, and more often than not I was the one who eventually woke up and walked away. (We won't talk about that last mistake... He did me a favor by dumping me. What *was* I thinking.)

    The right man is rare. Not quite Bigfoot rare, but for me, he was damn hard to find. Took me 17 years of hunting... er, I mean dating... to locate him and snare him for my own. It's been 8 years and he hasn't once tried to get away or made me want to run screaming.

  2. "I endeavor to make fresh, new mistakes when I make them."

    Yes! New mistakes. Those lead to learning. Same mistakes over and over? Pretty sure that's the definition of insanity.

  3. "I endeavor to make fresh, new mistakes when I make them." Love that, Linda! Great song, too!

  4. Well, at least you aren't repeating the same mistake over and over again. My guy meets all but one of those criteria, so I'm here to tell you that it is possible to find a guy that is close to your ideal (he is lacking on one item, but I'm not going to say which one, LOL). Thanks for reminding me of how lucky I was to find him!

  5. Thanks y'all. And thanks to jen for reaffirming my faith that there are fellas out there of a decent sort. :)