Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Did You Say Something, Man-Candy?


Once upon a spectacular summer vacation through the great palaces and monasteries of Spain, my sister and I had a Movie Moment. A sun-bronzed god in his crisp white shirt beckoned to us. Hot summer breezes blew through his thick raven hair as he ushered us into the cool darkness of his humble business. Our hearts pounded as his sea-green eyes settled upon each of us. His dusky lips parted.

A helium-esq squeak asked if wanted agua, con o sin gas
Some man candy should just…never speak.

I am a champion ogler, unrepentant to my lecherous core. Great guns? I’ll give ya something to shoot. Atlas’s shoulders? Come let Ma’ma ease your burdens. A bubble butt off of which I can bounce quarters? I got a roll right here, baby. Legs like redwoods? I don’t mind the climb.

One thing and one thing alone will turn my knees to jelly.  It has nothing to do with his appearance. It’s a specific timbre. 

The Bass-Baritone

I could wax lyrical on the way a man’s voice can play on a woman’s fantasies. I could, but I’ll let you have a listen for yourselves. That they're handsome too, well, that's a bonus. 

René Papé --The Demon of Dresden

Dmitri Hvorostovsky -- The Siberian Fox

Bryn Terfyl -- The Gentle Welsh Giant

Samuel Ramey -- The Letter "L" on Sesame Street!

Nathan Gunn – Eye Candy with Humor


  1. This reminds me of a football player that several women lust over...I won't say his name, but he isn't bad looking. Muscular, tattooed...yeah, kind of very hot. Then I heard him during an interview and I stared in horror at the television. Why? Because he had the voice octave of a 12-year-old boy which just seemed wrong for someone his size. Since then, I can't take him seriously as a stud. And you know I like my stud muffins!

  2. Ah, yes, the voice...most excellent! ;-)

    *I promise not to wax poetic about Sting's voice here. Promise.*


  3. I'm really enjoying this series. Can't wait until the next.

  4. I know a couple of guys who could sell beef. Makes me want some A-1.

  5. Ah, a tenor. My first love was a tenor, and yes, I fell in part for his voice. He used to sing me love songs. *sigh*

  6. Danica, oh *that* guy. Yeah. Him. Problem. There's a boxer with the same problem.

    Alayna, it's the rasp, isn't it? Yeah. Yeah. He can sing me stalker songs any day.

    Kay, glad you're leering along with us! I'm hoping tomorrow references guy-liner and skin-tight jeans.

    Gretchen, if they enter the market, I'll share the HP sauce.

    Jeffe, did he carry a guitar or was it all a capella?

  7. You like bass-baritones, you'd love my son. And he's a music major, too (doesn't work in the field, though, but was involved with the Dayton Opera for a season). I say he got his music ability from me, but I have no idea where he got the voice. No one in our family speaks that low.

  8. Bass-baritone is nice, but throw in an accent and I'm lost. Sean Connery is my man. Don't know if he can sing though -

  9. He doesn't need to sing. All he needs to do is read the phone book. ;-)

  10. Muppets and Carmen. how could you go wrong? I side with Jeffe on this. Speaking voice, I like low and mellow, but singing? Tenor. Remember Les Miserables? Or Phantom of the Opera? Oh yeah. Those guys hit those clear, ringing notes, and a shiver goes up my spine. Now. Does that mean I want one of them? No. But like Alayna said about Sting (and I'd totally buy into that lust!) shut up and sing, sweetheart.

  11. A capella - he didn't need no stinking accompaniment for that clear, ringing voice.