Social Media Sin #3

Phoning it in because you think you SHOULD. I mean. Everyone else is doing the Social Media thing! Taking the online world by storm. Or at least maybe talking to people. Via pixels. But hey! Selling things ulterior motive!

No. No. No. This is beaching yourself on the shores of social media hell simply because you envy someone else's easy, pithy style and/or number of followers. Yeah, I had to reach for a metaphor to match my photo. Work with me.

In echo of what Marshall said so well yesterday, the social media thing isn't compulsory. There are absolutely people who have just enough extroversion in their generally introverted little hearts to make the social media thing look easy. But, you know, do you. If watching your Twitter feed scroll gives you hives, don't do it. If Facebook or Pinterest or Tumblr or anything else is a black hole mysteriously swallowing hours of your day, you have a problem and should probably cold turkey that crack.

Here's the rule I apply to me: If fun = yes, then go. If fun = pulling teeth, then no. Okay. There is an ancillary rule: Word count for the day must be achieved BEFORE any social media. Because writing is my job. Social media is a tool, yes, and fun - but it supports the writing, not the other way around. Why such simple rules?

It goes back to Jeffe's theme on the subject: Engagement. I find that me yelling BUY MY THING is as much fun as slamming my fingers repeatedly in car doors. It's off-putting when someone else fills my feeds with desperate buy links, I have no intention of doing it to someone else. Now. Annoying people with cat photos? Or with ridiculous, nerdy memes? Or comically awful nihilistic end of the world scenarios? Sign me up. Yeah. I know. I need to work on my definition of fun, don't I? The thing is a sense of enjoyment translates. If the person behind the social media posts is genuinely having a good time posting, that comes through. And there's nothing like a bit of fun to draw people in to engage with you. At least, that works for me. Sure. There are people who attract attention by posting outrage over this cause or that cause. I'm glad there are people who do that - the unexamined dark corners of humanity could use a little light shone into them. If that's your thing, more power to you. But that's the point: Do what matters to you. Make room for having a good time.

Shoulds are boulders. They'll crush you if you let them.

Social Media Hell

I admit, I am nowhere near proficient with social media when it comes to using it as a tool. That IS my social media Hell. I use it like everyone else, for the entertainment value and to see what my friends are doing. To use it as a tool means learning a few things and techniques (I could apply myself), and having time to do it (that's the really difficult to do). These complaints are, perhaps, merely whining. But what time I have, is time I choose to spend writing rather than promoting. That's my call. For now, it's right.

Social Media Sin #2

As Jeffe so brilliantly pointed out on Sunday, social media is about interaction not broadcasting. This means we share a bit about ourselves and we react to information others share with us. In an ideal world a nice game of give and take.

Until...

Debbie Downer: Chronic Over-Sharer and Martyr for Misery 

Debbie's not having a bad day. She's having a horrible life and turning to social media for public sympathy. Her feeds are a 70/30 split of baiting misfortunes and actual interactions. She doesn't want therapy, advice, or help. She really doesn't want commiseration for fear of being out-miserabled. (Is too a word!) She craves the attention. Woe be to anyone venturing good news into their shared public space. Debbie is on her way to suck the joy out of everyone's day.

Debbie is so morose her mere presence causes rational people to flee, to unsubscribe, to block, to unfriend, and to delete with all haste.

Saints forfend should Debbie cross paths with Ranting Raylene who lives to agitate, instigate, and over-react.

Social Media Sin #1

Megan Hart and I at the Day of the Dead mixer at the Coastal Magic Convention. Those skeleton hands temporary tattoos were super cool - and hell to get off again. Oops.

But I'm here today to talk about virtual communities and circles of social media hell. Which do I pick as my current #1 Social Media Sin?

Abusing email loops.

I'm on a number of email loops, most of them various author groups. Some are authors who all write for a particular publisher, some are RWA chapter loops, some are loops for group blogs. They range in size from maybe a dozen members up to probably 500 or more for one of them. But the point remains that all of them are specific-purpose loops, for authors to interact.

And some people can't seem to get past sending emails about their latest blog post, book release or what-have-you to these loops. One gal is on three different loops with me, so I see her send several-weekly blog post announcements to all three loops. Over and over and over.

So, let's talk about why I'm sending her to this circle of Social Media Hell to be punished for eternity or until she reforms her ways. (Guess which outcome is more likely?)

Problem #1 - She's pinging the same finite audience with promo messages, over and over.

Pretty much only the people on that email loop will see the message. The exception would be if someone forwards a message off loop, which is usually against group policy and they're unlikely to forward your promo anyway. She must feel like she's accomplishing something, but she's broadcasting to the same people all the time. This is not building engagement. It's returning to the same billboard week after week to slap up a flyer in a slightly different color and leave again.

Problem #2 - She's irritating people.

Okay, she's irritating me. But I've heard other people mention her practice on this, too. Since these missives are pretty much the only things I hear from her - because I never click through to her blog posts - my entire association about her now is a sense of irritation. Sure, it's easy to delete and I do, but every time, a bit of that irritation builds. And it's not making a pearl, I can tell you that.

Problem #3 - She's talking to other authors, not to readers.

So, yes - authors are also readers. But we're not on those loops as readers. We're there to talk about our common profession, not to sell books to each other. I know a lot of you who read this blog are authors, particularly posts like this, which are more about author practices. But I'm talking to you about author things, which theoretically helps my overall reputation. I'm not yammering at you to buy my books. This is really key - know why you're talking to what group.

Problem #4 - She's broadcasting, not engaging.

Nathan Lowell is a newish friend of mine and has really smart things to say about marketing. One of the points he's made is that social media is about engagement and influence. It's a DIFFERENT kind of marketing than traditional advertising which works by way of broadcasting. A cereal brand puts commercials on TV or puts up billboards in the hope that a certain percentage of people who see those ads will respond by buying the product. Effective social media, however, is about creating communication with people who want to hear your message. Ideally everyone in your network who receives your message is someone who has opted in and is happy to hear it. Not irritated. (See #2.)

Problem #5 - She's oblivious to the purpose of the email loop.

By sending her blog post messages to the group - especially the same one to multiple groups - she's effectively telling us that she doesn't care about us or our common profession. She's making it clear that she's there to promote her career, not to form relationships with us or offer her expertise. She's telling me that she's not my friend. Which makes me feel like I'm not her friend either.

I've picked on one particular example here, but the principle applies to all interactions on email loops. They are not your street team or newsletter subscribers! If you abuse your email loops, then yes - you will find yourself in the circle of Social Media Hell that I rule. My demons will bombard you will email messages until you weep for mercy.

Until you promise to mend your ways.

Now, go forth, my people and pay attention to who you're emailing and why.

Top Ten Social Media Gaffes

Social media gaffes. What? You mean like the time I mortally and culturally embarrassed myself by asking on Twitter what GBP meant and Jeffe had to tell me, "Uhm. You know. The POUND. As in the currency of Great Britain." I slunk away into the backwaters of Twitter for a few days after that one.

TOP TEN SOCIAL MEDIA GAFFES

10. Offensive or titillating, incomplete click-bait post (click through! find out why you aren't making a million dollars! You'll be amazed!)

9. Overly emotional primary relationship venting. Twitter is not a qualified marriage counselor. Breaking up via text message, FB post, or in fewer than 140 characters is truly bad form.

8. ANYTHING that would make you show up on Straight White Guys Texting (Tumblr blog - before you go look, just remember that what you see cannot be unseen).

7. Live Tweeting your 'Beat the Tide Beer Race' that day you called in sick to work. Never mind that your boss and coworkers follow you.

6. SCREAM AND NAME CALL a fellow professional - editor, agent, fellow author, as yet unpublished author. Nah. You know what? Anyone. Do that to anyone.

5. Expect social media to educate you. That thing you don't know or understand? No one on Twitter owes you an encyclopedic explanation on it. You *might* get one. You might get a couple. But seriously, you want to comprehend the complexities of LGBTQ+ rights? Do some damn research. Expecting that cool gender queer person you follow on Twitter to explain it all is A) disrespectful and B) a pain in the ass.

4. Use someone else's photos, words, or art without permission much less attribution.

3. Not sending cat pictures. This is a big one. The internet is for two things and two things only. You already know the other four letter word. Cats are the other. Fail to post pics and see what happens when they finally achieve complete subjugation of the human race.

2. Not saying what you believe in a sane, rational way - you get to believe what you believe - just be aware that no matter what you believe, once you speak it - or commit it to the eternity that is the interweb - it's available for target practice. But you NOT speaking your truth is also a gaffe. Against yourself and anyone who wants to know who you are.

1. Trolling J.K. Rowling. She owes the internet. Troll her and see how fast she'll own you.

The Social Media Gaffe: Public Feeds vs Private Groups

Social Media Gaffes -- The Worst Thing Anyone Has Done To You

~scratches chin~

Tough topic. I haven't had "hold my purse" moment on social media since Online Communities became Social Media. Sure, there are the crass people who only post "Buy My Stuff" or CAPSLOCK EVERYTHING. They're easy enough to unfollow or ignore. I'm fortunate; I haven't attracted the real trolls to my public feeds. I'm still below their radars. I'm a teeny tiny fish--plankton, even.


Now, I've had plenty of volleys launched at me in private groups, which--for the record--are public forums. Most of the flying turds were due to me being the voice of organizational change. The implementor. The official communicator. The person holding the proverbial fan. While there is nothing wrong with voicing objections; there is an art to doing it in a professional and/or inoffensive manner. Unfortunately, there were more than a handful of folks who shared their displeasure via personal attacks. Fortunately, I chose not to take them that way.

Mother always said, "Consider the source."

If someone can't present a contrasting view/opinion from a position of logic, they aren't open to logical discussion. Emotional attacks are diatribes not debates. They are issued from positions of fear. Fear is something that cannot be eliminated via text.

Fairly simple, right? Not always.

There are times it takes me longer than it should to move past my initial rage and bristling defense in order to calm down enough that I can see it's not about me. It's about them.

In that way, succeeding as a writer is perfect practice for succeeding with social media. We have to have thick skins and solid beliefs in our very cores that rejections and bad reviews aren't manifestations of our personal flaws. We can choose to look at them as opportunities for improvement...or we can ignore them.

As the spokesperson for the leadership of those forums, the best I could do was acknowledge the attacker's concerns and thank them for being a member of the community. Some folks would leave it at that. Some took it as fuel and burned brighter and more publicly. I offered no further response. I let them burn.

Their fear is no cause to create fear in me.

Unless...doxxing. There is never an excuse for that. That's the time to get IRL authorities involved.

Social Media Gaffes

In honor of Mother's Day, I think this photo says it all. Also, I kind of love that the book my mom is showing me is Dr. Suess and how rapt my expression is. There's a reason the dedication in THE TALON OF THE HAWK says what it does.

I have to write an acceptance speech for the awards ceremony at the RT Convention this week, for the Seal of Excellence for THE MARK OF THE TALA. In a minute or less I have to thank everyone who brought me to this point. A daunting prospect. My primary goal is to get through it without weeping. You know I'll be mentioning my mom.

Happy Mother's Day, Mom!

Speaking of the RT Convention, I'll give a little shout out to the other woman who raised me, my grandmother, who I still miss. This photo also says it all about my formative influences.

Yes, my grandmother is giving me beer. She even wrote on the back that "she sure likes her ale - isn't this cute?" No, you can't prosecute her, as she's long since passed away. It was a different era and there's truth to the adage that ale is like mother's milk to the Irish!

Now you know why I'm always in the bar. Though you'll see me with Jameson or martinis, not ale these days. I get my vanity from my mother and grandmother, too.

This week's ACTUAL topic in the Bordello, following on last week's digital networking theme, is "social media gaffes – worst things anyone has done to you."

It's an interestingly phrased question - not how we ourselves have screwed up, but what someone else has done to annoy us. I'm pretty lucky in that not much of this has happened to me. I also block people pretty quickly if they step over my lines. One guy was trying to get me to post more pics of my over-the-knee socks. I said that wasn't my schtick. He persisted. I blocked.

Boom.

Several of the Word Whores were generous in their mentions of me in their posts, and how I've helped them network. I'm really happy to help people network and I don't mind the "coattailing," as Marcella calls it. But there are limits to that. First, let me say that none of the Word Whores have ever done this to me. There was this one gal, however...

We were on Twitter, as I am a lot of the time, and a book blogger was tweeting to me about loving my book. She and I were going back and forth, talking about my hero and what she loved about him. And another writer jumped in and started talking about HER hero and her upcoming book. She totally redirected the conversation.

It annoyed the hell out of me. Thought I did ask a couple of my friends to look, to do a crazy check to confirm that I wasn't overreacting. They agreed that it was rude.

The thing is, I know a lot of people hesitate to convo intrude on Twitter and I always tell them to go ahead. That's what Twitter is for. If people get annoyed that you jumped in on a conversation, screw them because then they shouldn't have been having the convo on open Twitter in the first place. The caution here, however, is don't be so socially tone deaf, so madly focused on self-promotion, that you jump on stage and wrench the spotlight from shining on someone else to focus it on yourself.

It's rude in real life. It's rude on social media.

What about you all - got any social media horror stories?

You all have a great week and hope to see you at RT!!

Introverts: The Time to Network Is ... Whenever The Mood Strikes

Networking in the Digital Age. The marketing message might as well be, "Yo, Introverts, it's safe to say hi then run away."

Note: I said "hi" not "Buy My Book, Buhbye"

Connecting with others at one's convenience around topics of one's true interests is what made the general population adopt the Internet. Trust me. I was there in the thick of it. (Yes, it was a few years after dinosaurs roamed the earth.)

Why Network: There are two reasons to network: visibility and opportunity. You get what you give. The tri-fold law of Karma plays heavily. Networking is not about direct sales. It's about creating and fostering relationships. While some relationships may not seem to have a direct correlation to our goals, we never know who else the people we meet know.

Where to Network: For writers--a notoriously introverted bunch--social media is dream come true. There are many, many different social sites to suit our various comfort levels of interaction. Jeffe was spot on when she wrote on Sunday, "if it ain't fun, don't do it." Is Facebook the bane of your existence? Try Pintrest instead. Twitter too hipster for you? Try LinkedIn. Taking "show not tell" to heart? Fire up a YouTube channel.

When to Network: We all lead busy lives, and writing needs to take priority over social networking. (The best marketing you can do is to write that next book!) Sometimes, that means we can't devote an hour or two a day to patrol our assorted networks. That's fine. The world keeps spinning without us. When we have a moment--and often it is just a moment--we connect with our networks and hopefully reengage in conversations. Time zone differences, offline work schedules, and life are all accepted justifications for our absences. And online, going offline is expected.

It's like having permanent permission to leave the party early! (Woot!)

So, while online networking can lead to offline meetups, we Introverts need not dread the interactions. The Digital Age is all about convenience and comfort--our convenience and comfort.  Go ahead, reach out to a stranger online. You might be connecting with your new best friend.

Networking in the Digital Age - Keeping It Fun

We went fishing yesterday. Which, in my world, means the man fishes and I sit in the sun and read. One of the ways the man and I are a good match - our favorite relaxation pastimes are compatible. It's good for me to get away from my desk and the laptop. Saturdays I typically take off from writing and getting out of the house adds to that mental relaxation.

But it's not quite as bucolic as it looks. I was reading on my iPad, which meant I could also chat with a book blogger who'd just finished THE TALON OF THE HAWK, along with posting photos of our day to Facebook and Twitter and replying to people who responded to those.

This is networking in the digital age for me.

I know some people out there might recoil at what I just described. They'd extoll the virtues of a paper book, the extended concentration of reading that without bouncing through various social media windows, of unplugging and going offline. There's a point to that - extended concentration offline does have a profound impact on my mind and well being. But I do that every day. I'm offline writing for hours six days a week.

When I'm not writing, or focusing on day job tasks, I'm online, popping in here and there. Networking.

See, I hate marketing. I don't trust it. I think it's manipulative and insincere. Yes, this is an issue of mine and I know it probably impacts my book sales. Still, it's a core belief for me. So I network instead. I like talking to people, especially those with shared interests like BOOKS. I especially like talking to people in controlled ways, where I can step back any time I like. Social media allows me to do that.

When authors complain about the amount of time and effort social media consumes, I sometimes wonder if they realize what a bounty of gifts the digital age has brought us. During my hours at the lake I finished reading one book, started another, and communicated with 500 people that I can count easily. Twitter doesn't count as easily, so it could be twice that.

More important - I had fun doing it.

I know we say that all the time, but it bears repeating. Social media should be fun. If it's not, stop right away. Step away. Close the window. Come back later. I often liken social media to parties. If you're not having fun at the party, people will notice and you'll do yourself damage instead of putting yourself in a positive light. I think Marcella's list from Friday, Top Ten Ways to Burn Down Your Public Persona, are great examples of how authors can poison their image because they're not having fun.

Networking is about making and *keeping* friendly relationships. The best way to do that is enjoy yourself and the people you talk to. When you stop having fun, the digital age lets you go dark and just watch the ripples in the lake for a while. 

The Me You See May Not Be The Real Me

There are such things as over-sharing, over-emoting, and overdoing it. There are also such things as best behavior, best foot forward, and the best of you.  That last one may actually be a Foo Fighters song.

Here at the bordello, we've written and spoken extensively about the positive results of positive public interactions--from social media to conventions; online and real world.  The short of it is: be nice, be pleasant, and be professional. Oh, and don't feed the trolls. And good hygiene is important.

Those are the underpinnings of my public persona.

Guess what. I'm not always nice, pleasant, remotely professional, or in something fresh from the wash. Shocking, I know,  I know. At any given time what you see could be a stark contrast to what's really going on with me.

Why? My sense of humor vacillates between that of a twelve-year-old boy and an erudite septuagenarian. It doesn't always translate well. When I'm tired or frustrated, I am exceptionally curt. Sarcasm is strong within me, and it's taken years to temper my innate viciousness. Usually, it's not my intention to offend and I don't tend to take offense easily. I know too well the tastes of crow and my foot. My default expression? It's not what it seems. I suffer from RBF (Resting Bitch Face).

Does that make my public persona disingenuous?

Nope. 'Cause I'm not feral. I'm an adult member of society with a strong sense of self. The public is not responsible for my emotional well-being nor am I responsible for theirs. I choose to engage in the social contract of pleasantness regardless of my private crazy. Frankly, I don't do public in search of burdens to bear, and I don't think anyone else does either.

Rest assured, should we ever meet online or offline: I'm a nice person, even if I seem reserved. I believe happiness is a choice and smiles are underutilized. I'm not wondering if you taste great with Chianti and fava beans.

If I have something in my teeth, be a sport and let me know, eh? I'd do the same for you.

Just for the Fun of It - Five to Follow

Five to Follow

Easiest blog post ever. My recommendation: Figure out what you care about. Follow that. Bonus points if you can learn something. Bonus points if what you follow makes you laugh. Extra-bonus, bonus points if it's both at one time. Here are a few of mine.

@spacedotcom - because space. If you science, NASA has a bunch of Twitter handles, too. Each of the active space craft have active Twitter accounts. There are even a few spoof accounts, like @sarcasticrover - which commonly laments being abandoned to lonely servitude on Mars. @newhorizons2015 is coming up on a drive-by of Pluto. Yes. This is 100% geek fodder. I still follow @philae2014 (RIP) - the lander that @ESA_Rosetta put down on that comet. Nothing warms a dork heart like getting to look at grainy space photos that never make the news orgs. it's for all of us who grew up pretending we were all going to be astronauts.

@bigcatrescue - Lions and tigers and bobcats. Lots more. Photos. Sometimes video. The sanctuary does great outreach work. They give their big cats lots of fun enrichment - entire raw turkeys at Thanksgiving - and video the cats having the time of their lives. Some times, you just need to watch a tiger bounding around with a turkey carcass dangling from her mouth. I can justify this as a writing site by saying did you know tigers chuff in greeting? Do you know what that sounds like? These guys have a video of that. C'mon. Surely you need to know that. For something. Somewhere.

Local news orgs - No handles cause I recommend following your own local news orgs - this is for local alerts and emergency notification. As I type, we have a major weather event inbound. Local news stations get everything out on Twitter before they manage to get it on radio or TV. Finally. Most of our weather people live Tweet major weather events, tracking them as the systems march into the city. Very useful for knowing when to double down on the lines tying us to the dock.

@writeremergency (this was from a kickstarter - dunno how this is going to pan out yet, but the concept is awesome) - These guys developed a sort of tarot pack for writers - it's a deck of cards specifically designed to break up writer blocks, jump-start ideas and generally prod you into action on your writing. I funded these guys because the whole thing sounded like fun. I should get a deck from them. Review forthcoming.

@conspiracystuff - This is one of those accounts that both gives me info I wouldn't otherwise have and which makes me laugh. Matt and Ben are conspiracy theory nuts, however, they are also really good at research (or have people who are) so when they dive into covering a conspiracy theory, they really go for all sides of the story. They delve into history. And some of the things they cover are just plain weird. I love these guys because the story ideas they hand me are legion.

Just for fun:
@ghouliachilds - because horror themed food, photos and recipes. I should have grown up in the Addams Family because horror and food are, in my opinion, the perfect match. Besides. Food is often pretty much about all the horror.

@thegoodgodabove - Love this account. The Good God Above is also Facebook God. Comedy. Irreverence. Making a positive difference. And occasionally baiting the haters. What's not to like?

And you know, if you want cat photos and the occasional snarky comment, you're more than welcome to follow me. @marcellaburnard 

Five Things I'm Following

I have to admit, I'm still figuring out social media, especially Twitter.  I don't think I'll ever become a "Twitter personality", in part because I focus a lot of what I "have to say" here on the blog, or don't say publicly.  Plus, when it comes to any issue I care about, by the time I reach Twitter, it's been said better and smarter by someone else.
I wouldn't say I'm overly choosy about who I follow-- on Twitter or elsewhere-- but I don't like a particularly crowded feed.  So anyone I follow who is a high-volume poster, they better be posting things I want to read*, as well as things that I'm not likely to find elsewhere.  Which is why I follow @saladinahmed and @lisabolekaja, who both post and re-tweet things that I, in my relatively sheltered life, might not otherwise be aware of.  So I value getting their points of view.
I'm also a big fan of @NussbaumAbigail, partly for her twitter feed, but mostly for her blog Asking the Wrong Questions.  I don't always agree with her points of view on things (though I think she's spot-on when it comes to Battlestar Galactica), but I really enjoy reading her thoughts.
Outside of the twitterverse, I've become mildly obsessed with John Green's Crash Course on YouTube, especially the World History episodes.  Honestly, if you're a writer doing any sort of large-scale worldbuilding, it's a great, well, crash course in the basics of the rise of civilization.  I mean, most of it was stuff I essentially knew, but getting a refresher in a charismatically presented package helped re-frame my thoughts.
Finally, for something different and fun, I'm also a big fan of Scott Bradlee & Postmodern Jukebox.  Scott and his wide array of musician friends take modern pop songs and reframe them in old and different styles.  It's like peeking into an alternate timeline.

----
In other news: ARCs of Thorn of Dentonhill have arrived!  I now have an actual, tangible THIS IS A REAL BOOK thing.  I'm now almost completely sure that I'm not the victim of some super-elaborate prank.
----
*- I could tell you stories of the person I briefly followed who had set up a series of twenty-odd randomized autotweets plugging her books. Every day, three to five times a day, one of the same "BUY MY BOOK!" tweets. DON'T DO THIS.

Social Media: 5 Follows

Wow, 5 follows from my odd social media collectives. My feeds and follows are a strange stew of politicos, newsies, foodies, and random publishing industry folks. I'll, uhm, assume you're not here for updates on the Russian state of affairs via PM Dmitry Medvedev or sales on 3-Ways from Skyline Chili. So, I'll go with the writing folks...

On Twitter

@TobiasBuckell
An SFF writer with a keen eye on industry ... and not just publishing. He's a "futurist" who intelligently comments on everything from global solar innovations to Kindle Unlimited's impact on eBook sales. His blog is part of my regular weekly reading: http://www.tobiasbuckell.com/blog

@Gollancz
They're the SFF & Horror imprint for Orion Publishing out of the UK. I call out these guys for being a publisher who gets the whole social media thing and how to use Twitter well. They don't just plug sales links; they'll post anything from STNG clips to "Guess that passage" games. Most importantly, they engage with their followers. If you want a good example of how to use Twitter as a business, follow these guys.


@ChuckWendig
He's an SFF author with a stash of How To Write books rounding out his book list. His style is distinct and probably not for everyone. (If "fuck" makes you cringe, don't look. Better yet, run away.) When he's not amusing his audience with the antics of his toddler, Chuck weighs in on hot-button issues like gender equality and professionals behaving badly. His blog offers everything from writing prompts and contests, to best practices and public chastisings: http://terribleminds.com/ramble/blog


On Facebook

@WriterBeware
Victoria Strauss is a priceless resource for helping authors CYA in the publishing world. From shady presses to NYC kerfuffles, Victoria presents well-researched issues in layman's terms. When she throws the flag on a business, pay attention. She's also on Twitter as her author persona @victoriastrauss. The Writer Beware Blog is here: http://accrispin.blogspot.com

I fucking love science
Science...the final frontier... The name is self-explanatory. The reason to follow is for the news, tidbits, breakthroughs, and DYKs Elise reports that spark one's imagination. Since I'm not remotely tapped into any of the many science communities, I like the "Science Lite" newsletterish feel of her posts and her website IFLScience.

I don't know any of these folks personally, I'm simply one of the many who tune in for what they have to say. I like to follow people who can teach me something and/or who make me think. I don't always agree with them or with what they report, but I do like the mental exercises.

Web Presence: KAK Attack

Where, oh where, can one find me on the interwebs?

This Blog. Every Tuesday.
I participate in this blog to connect with the many writers and readers who pass through here. Also, it allows me to have a regular web presence for those in the industry who care about such things (yes, there are still folks out there who actually care).  How much time I spend here is ... strangely consistent. Regardless of length of finished product, writing the post takes two hours. Even the pithy super-short posts.  Longtime readers of this blog will know I'm not a fast writer. I write the post then delete the whole post. Write it again, then delete half of the post. Write again, and delete a quarter of it. Eventually, I get 'round to my point sans epic tangents. I do read the comments and respond. It doesn't take much time, and I believe in demonstrating my appreciation for the commenter's participation.

My Website & Related Blog 
The website exists for when I have books available, so readers will be able to find said books quickly and conveniently.  It is informative, not interactive. It is mostly evergreen -- aka static information.  At most, there's a week once a year when I try to update it using my very pathetic web skills.

The blog exists for when 140 characters aren't enough for my soapbox. It is purely self-indulgent. Mind you, I post to my blog maybe a dozen times a year, usually when the industries I follow do something noteworthy (or bitch-worthy; either way).  Posting might increase slightly when I have topics relevant to the release of my books. Again, informative, not really interactive. At best, it's like a lecture with Q&A opportunity.

Facebook
I use FB to stay in touch with folks I've known over the years and assorted careers...in spite of the business's rampant data harvesting, illogical algorithms for display feeds, and offensive ads. I scan FB daily, usually twice a day. I'm one of those users who "likes" a lot of posts--because other people's updates are interesting--but I only comment sporadically. For me, Facebook is the equivalent of digital small talk, which is not this introvert's forte. I do try to be more engaging, some months more than others.

Twitter
I'm on this service the most; yea though, you might not be able to tell of late.  I frequently check Twitter, but often forget to tag into a conversation I'm following. It's here you're more likely to learn of my TV viewing habits, my obsession with bass-baritones, my penchant for booze, my interest in global economics, my random musical earworms, and the seasonal antics of my niblings.  For whatever reason, I am most comfortable on Twitter as a social media platform. I use Twitter to connect with interesting people on a variety of topics. When it comes to forging new online relationships, this where I'm most likely to do it.

There you go, dear readers, feel free follow or friend!

A Brief History of Jeffe's Online Presence

Yesterday, Chis Baty, founder of NaNoWriMo - or National Novel Writing Month for those not into hip blended terms - came to speak to my local RWA chapter, LERA. He started the annual event in 1999 with six friends. A fascinating story, about how it's grown to 400,000 participants and the huge role social media has played in that growth. For example, in the early days, writers would email him their word counts and he built progress bars manually with blocks of color.

Can you imagine?

At any rate, it was interesting to hear this history and recall that, in 1999, though we had the Internet, most people were not using it socially the way we are today. It makes this week's topic of Managing Your Online Presence: How, Where, How Often, Why Did You Choose the Platforms You Did? that much more apropos.

I've never been a first implementer on new tech - have never been the one to have to have the newest, snazziest thing - but, to my ongoing surprise, I tend to be a fairly early implementer. So here's a rough chronology of my online presence.

Email

I started using A-1 Mail back in the late 80s, on my university server. Clunky and not terribly useful because so few people were on it. By the mid-nineties, however, Hotmail and some other free email services became available and I used them extensively to talk to friends and family. I might have been a driving force there, encouraging people to sign up so we could communicate.

Instant Messenger

 I can't recall exactly when IM kicked in, except that it went more or less in tandem with increasing email use. I'm sure we were using it in the mid-nineties, playing with dressing our avatars, etc. This was even better than email, allowing for much more immediate daily contact.

Website

I put up my first website in 2003. My first book - my essay collection, Wyoming Trucks, True Love and the Weather Channel - came out in March of 2004, so I had a website designed for that, with the JeffeKennedy.com domain name. Before that I'd had a website I made myself called BrightLynx.com, where I posted a lot of my experimental work and news of published essays and awards. It's too bad that these things predate even Google (I recall using HotBot as my favored search engine), so I don't think there's even a cache anywhere of these early sites. Too bad. I think I paid $1500 for that professional website and then maintained it myself.

Listservs and Email Loops

A lot of people signed up for - or were co-opted - into Listservs long before I was. I kind of resisted those. And no one insisted I be on them. However, particularly when I joined RWA in 2008, I started learning to be part of email loops, first to take online classes and then to participate in my online groups like the Fantasy, Futuristic and Paranormal Chapter of RWA.

Blogging

I started a blog in 2009. Long after many of my friends had started bugging me to do it, saying I'd be a natural. That original blog, Love, Power and Fairytale Endings, is still preserved forever (?) on Blogger and those posts have also been imported into my current blog on my website. My first blog post ever is here and kind of amusing to read. Word Whores was my first ever group blog (aww), which I helped Allison Pang start in 2011, along with sister original Word Whores Linda Robertson, Kristine Krantz and Marcella Burnard.

Facebook

I joined in early 2009 when I started blogging, for the express purpose of pimping my blog posts. At the risk of going all nostalgic and glory days about it, Facebook was great fun back then. It was an explosion of rediscovering casual contact with all kinds of people I hadn't talked to in forever. I later capitulated and added my Author Page, because my publisher told me to. I'm still there, because there are so many people I wouldn't be in touch with otherwise, but every day I consider bailing...

(I should note here that I joined MySpace at the same time as Facebook, for the same reason. I don't recall making the decision to leave - my presence there just kind of faded away. Pretty quickly, too. I missed its glory days and never much liked it.)

Twitter

I joined Twitter a bit after Facebook, in September of 2009. I love Twitter. It's my favorite online presence. I really hope they don't go all Facebook on me. It's amusing, I get this weekly report on my Twitter activity. They recommend I tweet at least once a day in the same breath that they inform me I've tweeted 600 times that week. I like Twitter.

Goodreads

 It looks like I joined Goodreads in June 2010. It's not as easy to discern on there. Goodreads is still one of my favorite online places to be, particularly as I can track what I'm reading and it crossposts to Facebook and Twitter. I have great conversations over books, which has always been one of my very favorite activities.

Tumblr

I'm pretty sure Tumblr counts as my most recent online presence effort. Before you do any clicking, know that many of the pics are very explicit and sexy. I started Jeffe's Closet on a whim in March of 2013. I decided that, since I was looking at a lot of the pictures anyway, and I'd noticed that I preferred some people's collections far better than others, that I might as well make use of that time spent. I was nervous because I thought it might attract creepers. Instead I have a loyal following of people who love what I love. It's been amazing. Particularly when a famous author tells me stories about her senior citizen mother trolling my Tumblr. Makes a girl proud.

What I draw from this (not so brief) history is that my answer to the topic question, particularly Why Did You Choose the Platforms You Did? is that it happens pretty organically for me. I tend to do what I like doing and fall away from the stuff I don't like. MySpace, for example. More recently, I did get on Google Plus, because I was supposed to, but I rarely go there. This organic process makes sense to me because social media SHOULD be that way. It's an outgrowth of our human sociability. My online presence is really just another facet of my presence in the world. Where and how I choose to be online is much the same as where and how I choose to go hiking or to parties or even to the grocery store.

It's all good.

Social Media Butterfly

'Know thyself' was inscribed in the pronaos (forecourt) of the Temple of Apollo at Delphi. Apparently, several philosophers have tried to define precisely what that means, today, here's my take: Know thyself in all aspects - good, bad. Strengths and weaknesses. No over estimating. No under estimating. Foibles, quirks, everything. Presumably, by knowing all of these things, you are then armored. It becomes harder for your weaknesses and foibles to subsequently be used against you. In ancient Greece, where capricious gods were thought to affect everyday life, that sort of armor was vital.

I suggest it still is. Perhaps not because of capricious gods, though, to each his or her own, you know? No, my thought is that it's best to go armored to some extent against social media. Why? Because social media presents a false front. A façade. One that can depress the crap out of you. From CBS: "A new study shows that Facebook may help people feel connected, but it doesn’t make them any happier. In fact, according to the research, which was conducted by the University of Michigan, Facebook use actually predicts a decline in a person’s well-being."

From a Slate article titled "The Antisocial Network": ""Misery Has More Company Than People Think," a paper in the January issue of Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, draws on a series of studies examining how college students evaluate moods, both their own and those of their peers. Led by Alex Jordan, who at the time was a Ph.D. student in Stanford's psychology department, the researchers found that their subjects consistently underestimated how dejected others were–and likely wound up feeling more dejected as a result. . .Jordan got the idea for the inquiry after observing his friends' reactions to Facebook: He noticed that they seemed to feel particularly crummy about themselves after logging onto the site and scrolling through others' attractive photos, accomplished bios, and chipper status updates. "They were convinced that everyone else was leading a perfect life.""

Note that these studies didn't differentiate between introverts and extroverts. Everyone felt worse. As a terminally geeky kid who grew into an equally geeky adult, I've always had this secret longing to belong - to be one of the cool kids. They had life SO much better. From the too loud laughter and fashionable clothes, it was obvious. And yet, even after achieving some level of belonging in groups that mattered to me (finding my tribe among writers, being published) I had other people looking at me like I was one of the cool kids, but I STILL look at Twitter posts from people I follow and I get that same lonely, stuck-on-the-outside-looking-in twinge. All because a few authors whose feeds I read present a chipper, clever, everything's always perfect front. They're doing more, being more. I end up feeling left in the dust. Granted there will always be something to aspire to - that's necessary if you're to have goals. But how healthy is it to allow something like tiny status updates on Facebook or Twitter or Tumblr or Pinterest to shape what you think you want to strive for?

This isn't to say that I advocate abandoning social media altogether. I don't. See last week's post on a similar subject. Absolutely engage in social media. Just be aware and remind yourself of a few things:

• If it isn't fun, don't do it
• Be aware that it's human nature to compare yourself to other people and that social media posts can never give you an accurate picture of another person.
• Accept that social media posts do not represent reality - they're a Christmas card snapshot where everyone's had a little too much eggnog and they're all dressed in gaudy red and green sweaters while they grin manically in front of the tree. Sub in umbrella drinks and bikinis on the beach - whatever is guaranteed to poke your jealously and sense of inadequacy with a sharp stick.
• Know thyself and then to thine own self be true (Polonius in Hamlet) - know your limits and stick to them. If an hour a day is all you can stand with social media, then by all means, give that hour your all. Then walk away, whistling and smiling. You've done good work.
• Recognize the signs of addiction - I'm only half kidding - apparently, it's possible. Keep track of your word counts on your WIPs. Are they dropping? Are you checking social media while you're out with loved ones or friends? At the dinner table? Beware, social media butterfly. That way lies madness. Unplug the router. Put down the cellphone - better yet - give it to a really mean but beloved friend and step away from the never-ending status updates.

Is engaging in social media strictly necessary? Probably not. Plenty of books sell without it. However, most publishers ask authors to engage. So in the interests of being a team player, put up that Facebook page, start that Twitter account - or whatever it is that sounds like a good time. And then do whatever it takes to protect your mental and emotional wellbeing and above all your writing. If your anxiety levels about what you're achieving start rising, you may be comparing yourself unfavorably to all of the 'I wrote 20k words today!' posts.

Social media isn't an accurate representation of anyone. You are far more than any collection of 140 word tweets. Or sunny vacation FB photos. So is everyone else.

Social Graces

by Allison Pang

So first off - I have to wish a Happy Birthday to Word-Whore Jeffe Kennedy today...and of course, the main reason I remember her birthday so easily is because hey, it's my birthday too. :D  (Birthday twin powers, activate!)

*ahem*

It's also fellow author Jane Kindred's birthday, so really it's just cakes and confetti and naked pool boys all around, right?

Anyway, social media has been around in one form or another for several years, and we've become more sophisticated in how we consume and produce it.

Remember back in the day when someone decided that writing an email in all caps equates to shouting? And of course now, it's so ingrained in our psyche that just seeing ALL CAPS MAKES US WINCE. RIGHT? And remember when email was dial-up access only? And then we got blackberries and smartphones and now we're connected all the time and there's no such thing as leaving work at the office anymore. We read articles all the time about how people take working vacations and check email and the internet from the moment they get up until the moment they go to bed. It's having some rather pointed and lousy effects on family and health dynamics all across the board, simply because people cannot shut off.

My point being is that the more things change, the more things stay the same. Take Twitter, for example. When it first showed up, it was your basic 140 characters - and not only could you see a person's tweets, you could see all their friend's tweets too. (Sort of as a rolling conversation of tiny sentences.) Of course, Twitter went through many changes and now we've got hashtags and embedded pictures and links and all sorts of fun stuff. But follow a few too many people and you're bound to miss a lot of the conversation.

So that's where tools like Tweetdeck or HootSuite come in - designed around the Twitter interface, you can track hashtags or keywords, usernames or whatever else you want. And really, it's the only way to make sense of it - I've got columns for anything that references me or the titles of my books or things of general interest to me. And then we have Twitter etiquette - how much marketing is too much? Is it rude to DM people directly to ask them to buy your books? (YES.) And so on...

And each bit of social media seemingly has its own rules and etiquette levels - so it's not even enough to be a part of them - whether it's Facebook or Pinterest or Tumblr or Vine or whatever. As someone who is attempting to put a public persona out into the world, authors have to have some sense of what is and isn't polite. (YMMV, of course - it's one thing to purposely be a troll - but how many newbie authors do we see constantly slamming the tweetstream with requests to check out their books, simply because their publishers said this is what they should do? And guess how many of those books I buy? Nada.)

It can get pretty overwhelming after a while, which is why the general consensus is to only use the social media you like and will actually keep up with. Social media doesn't work too well if you only pop in every once in a while. Content is king - however you choose to provide it, the key is to consistently provide it.

I tend to be an overachiever. (Or a glutton for punishment.) At one point I had two blogs, three tumblrs, 4 twitter accounts, 2 facebook account/pages, etc... Plus I blogged every day.

But that sort of total internet immersion comes with a price. At the time I could pull it off simply based on the fact that I had pockets of free time at my job. (No longer the case. I'm drowning in work every day.) And maybe I was more driven a few years ago than I am now. I made more time for social media because I needed to get my name and my work out there. Even so, trying to balance all of that with the day job and the writing and the family...it leads to a certain amount of resentment after a while, which in turn leads to less efficient use of time. (At least for me - nothing quite like endlessly scrolling through Tumblr instead of doing what I should be.)

I've cut back on that these days - between the blog tours for the book releases and health issues, I've become burned out on the blogging aspect in particular. I seem to have taken a bit of a summer break, in fact - and I'm only randomly posting here and there, which isn't good, but hopefully I'll get back into the swing of things. I am still on Twitter and Facebook, though not as often as I was. I'm on Tumblr every day, mostly reblogging things that make me think or laugh or whatever.

As far as time-balancing advice goes? I think that it's going to be different for everyone. Spreading yourself too thin is a fool's game, especially if it's coming across as superficial. I know a lot of people who don't like to blog - believe me, readers can spot that a mile away. If you're not having fun with what you're doing, chances are no one else will either. If you find social media cutting into important things - actual writing time, family time, job time - then it's time to rein it in and maybe focus your efforts onto one or two avenues of social media where you can have a greater impact.

But at the end of the day, we need to remember that it's okay to unplug.

Rule of Three & Managing Time on Social Media

Unless you're Doc Brown hopping timelines in your DeLorean retrofitted with a flux-capacitor, you have to learn to manage your time wisely.  All of your time cannot be spent on effectively participating in social media.

Hey, you have to pee sometime...

...and no phones in the potty.

The Rule of Three lends itself nicely to the topic of Managing Your Time on Social Media. Here are my Top Three Tips:  

1) Pick THREE social media outlets to build your presence. Yes, I am seconding Jeffe's advice from Sunday. Any more than three outlets and you're diluting your effectiveness.Which three? Whichever ones you are most comfortable using.

2) Allot THREE Hours Maximum: Seriously. If you have a habit of losing half your day to GoodReads, Facebook, Pintrest, etc., set a timer for an hour.  Do this two or three times a day, but no more than that. Three hours, folks, is more than enough time to build online relationships. Your revenue is not earned by the number of tweets you send, it is earned by the number of books you sell. The more books you write, the more inventory you have to sell.

3) Choose THREE Conversations: For those of us who are socially stunted, engage in at least three conversations daily. Each day, converse with three people with whom you have not interacted in the past week. This correlates to the corporate advice of eating lunch with a different person everyday. Not only does it widen your network and deepen your knowledge, it encourages you to look at those growing numbers of folks in your Followers and Friends lists. (Note: this doesn't mean you should ignore someone just because you "spoke" to them yesterday. None of us is that stunted, right? RIGHT?)


The Rule of Three, there to help you manage your social media experience. Do you, dear readers, have a Rule of The Social Three you'd care to share?

Jeffe's Five Tips for Using Social Media on a Time Budget

We Word Whores love to socialize. From the quiet safety of our bordello, that is.

That's the kind of whores we are - we love to sell our wares, but our product is our stories, not our sexy selves. Except, that's not really true, is it?

For example, on the cover of Act 4 of my six-episode eSerial, Master of the Opera, my name is pretty much the same size as the act title, Dark Interlude. Just yesterday I was having a conversation with my man, David, who has started reselling books on Amazon. He's learning lots about books and book sales - things like what is a mass-market paperback and predicting when a used book might come into vogue again, such as when the movie comes out - knowledge that I've taken for granted. I told him it's kind of a joke in the business that you've made it when your name is bigger than the title. It gets a little freaky, in fact, like those Janet Evanovich books where her name takes up the ENTIRE cover and you can barely figure out what the title is.

Art tends to be associated with the person. Perhaps because it's so much an expression of ourselves. When was the last time you heard a reader say "Oh, I'm so in the mood for a Kensington Press book!" as opposed to "I can't wait to read the new JD Robb!"

So, where we might feel that we're pimping out our words and not our bodies, the truth is that being the face and personality that brings our stories together is vitally important.

Fortunately we have social media!

This week's topic is Social Media: Using It without Losing All of Your Time.

I kind of cringe every time I hear someone say they don't have time for social media. Because, really, if your publisher sent you on a three-week book tour of the major cities, you'd make time for that. And it would be three solid freaking weeks out of your life when you got Nothing Else Done. More, any of us would go happily because, yo! BOOK TOUR.

Those days are pretty much gone if you're not Neil Gaiman and having a road named after you. But you don't have to be a Famous Author to use social media. All you need is an internet connection and some sort of access to it with a keyboard - both of which can be found for free - and you're set.

But, Jeffe, you whine (yes, I hear you) - I'm so BUSY already that I barely have time to write! How can I possibly find the time for this??

I'm telling you, it doesn't have to take that much time. It's a matter of deciding how you spend it. So here's

Jeffe's Five Tips for Using Social Media on a Time Budget:

1) Pick Your Poison - Just like nobody promised you a rose garden (dating myself), nobody ever said you have to do All The Things. In fact, please don't. The magic number is, and always will be, three things. Pick three avenues into the Interwebz that you enjoy and do those and only those. Can you do more than three? Sure - but this is about being on a time budget. Some venues to choose from:

1. Individual blog
2. Group blog (like this rocking one!)
3. Twitter
4. Facebook
5. Goodreads
6. Google +
7. Fan forums

This is just off the top of my head - there are tons more. Don't listen to the people who say "you have to be on X" or "all the readers are on Y." Pick three you like (see Bonus Advice!) and focus on them. Which leads to my next point.

2) FOCUS

If you want to be efficient about your social media time investment, concentrate on doing that. Don't watch TV. Don't try to write at the same time. Don't go down the rabbit holes (see Tip #3). Treat social media as the time investment it is. Pay attention to what other people are saying and posting and respond to it sincerely. Just like it's rude (and ineffective) to talk to people while you're watching TV (because your attention is divided), the same works for social media. Pay attention to the people you're interacting with.

3) Don't Go Down the Rabbit Holes

Okay, we all know this. The Internet, by its very nature, is full of rabbit holes. You could spend YOUR ENTIRE LIFE reading interesting (or banal) stuff and never get to it all. Don't try. For example, when I visit the Science Fiction Writers of America (SFWA) forums, I pick one thread to look at and respond to. Then I close it. On Twitter, I use the list function and have columns set up on TweetDeck to organize the people I follow by who they are to me - friends, writing friends, agents & editors, book reviewers, booksellers & librarians, etc. I don't look at each column every time. Instead, I'll peruse one or two and respond to some, then close it down. On Facebook, I use notifications to make sure I see stuff from the people I most want to. If you're doing social media right, the people you follow post fascinating things - but you cannot read them all. Don't try. And when you do read, RESPOND. Otherwise, you just blew the point of your being there to interact.

4) Set a Time Limit

I have my browser (Firefox) to open to the pages I look at regularly: Facebook, Blogger (for my two group blogs located there), my own blog, Goodreads, SFWA, the Contemporary Romance Cafe group blog, and Tumblr. I also open TweetDeck. But wait, Jeffe! cry you math geniuses out there, Isn't that way more than three? Well, yes. Yes it is. But, I work from home for my day job for a company based out of a city on the east coast, with a team of people scattered across the country. I am on the Internet All Day Long. I don't have to be on a time budget so much, except in being careful to get all of my work done. This is why I touch each thing and then close it. I dip in maybe 5-7 times a day, look at a few TweetDeck columns (and respond!), peruse the latest on Facebook. If I follow a link to a blog post or interesting article, I make sure to comment or share it. (Unless it falls in the "banal" category, which sadly happens more often than it should.)

Then I move on. If necessary, I use Freedom, to make sure I can't look. Set a timer if you have to.

5) Invest in What You're Doing

Okay, this is the advice you won't like, but if you're having trouble finding time because you don't have regular Internet access - like if you're behind a firewall at the day job - then you have to invest in an alternate portal. In other words? Get a damn Smart Phone already. I know, I know - your flip phone still works fine, despite that the top is duct-taped on. But come on - the technology is here to stay. You can access every social media site from a Smart Phone app. You take breaks during the day, the kids are off on the swing set, the pointy-haired boss left for his daily "errand" that involves sneaking off to the bar. Use that time to check in. This is an investment in your career. Five minutes here and there can be all you need.

BONUS Advice: Have Fun

Seriously. Take the "social" out of "social media" and you have, um, well - "media." And who likes that? If you limit your social media activity to things you enjoy, then it's not a burden. Talk to people. Read interesting things. Laugh. Share the cute kitty pictures and don't listen to the snarky hipsters who bitch about that sort of thing. Don't worry about being cool. Be like the people at the water park who run around in their swimsuits and forget to hold in their stomachs because they're having so much fun.

Do what you like and people will get to know the real you.

Stop by the bordello and let us know how it goes! Virtually, of course. ;-)