Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Shitting Diamonds vs Eating Them

by KAK 

Which of my characters am I most or least like?

I am least like my protagonists.

They all contain a piece of someone I'd like to be. Yes, they're all women. Yes, they're all far more physically fit than I could ever hope to be. No, they're not remotely human.

The Healer: A symbiont who fixes people from the inside. She has a temper like a neutron bomb. Likes to dive into glacier oceans ... naked. Oh, and she's blue and heavily tattooed.
Me: I get woozy at the merest whiff of hospital. A speculum is the evil Iron Man of the duck world. Needles will drop my ass before the vampire in scrubs turns around. While I like the idea of throwing things when I'm angry, I despise the reality of having to clean up afterwards. This means I don't throw, I twitch. Swimming? I don't have gills; therefore, I don't do oceans.
Admired Trait: She took down a villain who was publicly loved. She assumed the punishment that should have been his in order to protect his victims from social censure. I wish I had the guts and the wherewithal.

The Kontro: She's learning how to seize the freewill from specific people rather than entire nations. Fire runs in her veins instead of blood. She eats gemstones and has a set of parasites in her hands that extend into blades. She also has family issues -- "I beheaded my mother" sort of issues.
Me: I can't retain my own thoughts, much less dink with someone else's. I'm warm blooded, contrary to what beaus of bygone eras may believe. I may have shat a diamond or two -- but purely euphemistically. I much prefer to wear precious stones. As for my mother, she's alive and mostly well.
Admired Trait: She has an unshakeable sense of self, even though everyone around her is trying to convince her she's broken and needs to be "remolded." Plus, she's neither modest nor boastful. The very few things I know I know ... I can be a total dick about them.

The characters I am most like are the sidekicks.

I imbue the sidekicks with one (or more) of my exaggerated personal traits. If there's an opportunity to say the wrong thing at the wrong time, consider it done. Reserved in unfamiliar company morphs into a mute with highly expressive lips. Those twitchy temper tantrums are totally a sidekick's tell. Rude, crude, lewd, and socially unacceptable? Absolutely and as often as possible -- only the sidekicks gets to say the stuff aloud.

The fact I find myself funny may or may not translate to the sidekicks. That's up to the reader to decide.

blue woman image from: http://www.eons.com/groups/topic/2469617-TUES-THEME-Blue-Lady-
fire woman image from: http://www.freecomputerdesktopwallpaper.com/new_wallpaper/Fire_Woman_Wallpaper_freecomputerdesktopwallpaper_1280.shtml


  1. You can *always* be my sidekick! As long as I don't have to feed you gemstones...

    1. LEEzard likes Sapphires ~brow waggle~

  2. "I'm warm blooded, contrary to what beaus of bygone eras may believe." LOL