Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Some Things Daddies Don't Want to Know

by KAK 

A lot of kids, when they go off to college, get a lecture from mom and dad on responsibility, attaining goals, or how a telephone works for more than just texting. My father, a man more Victorian than Victoria, gave me the most valuable piece of advice.

Some things daddies don't want to know.

Sound, sage, advice. Advice I definitely apply to certain genres I've written. Those erotica novels burning up my hard drive? Handing one of those to my dad? Nay, nay. No, no. Nein, nein. The high fantasy with a protagonist who has a penchant for blood play? Yeah, sure. Why the difference? Because erotica is 93% sex. Dad can't "gloss over" that. The high fantasy? The tawdry bits are maybe 15%. We can sit around the holiday dinner table and discuss the other 85% of the book without embarrassing either one of us.

Mom's a whole different sort of story.

My mother is very frank about sex...often in a cover-your-ears and scream "TMI" sort of way. Mom wouldn't be remotely offended by a vanilla sex scene. She'd read it and move along. Thing is, I don't really write vanilla sex. So, while she'd read all about hunchbacking happening, there'd inevitably be the point and time at which she would close the book, set it on her bedside table, pick up the phone, and call me. Not to discuss the mechanics of whatever acrobatics went on, but to have a heart-to-heart about the psychological ramifications of what the characters are demonstrating and how that's being reflected in my real life.

There are some things daughters don't want to discuss.

My folks are incredibly supportive of my writing aspirations. They eagerly await the day they can buy the first 1000 copies of whatever I manage to get published. They are standing by ready to be my mobile marketing machine. Mom & Dad the Street Team. The day I can put a book in their hands, they will be off and running. That book will just happen to be a High Fantasy.

Erotica? There are some things I only want you, dear readers, to know.

So tell me, would you ever gift your parents with an erotica novel? Why or why not?


  1. It is sound, sage advice. Your folks sound like lovely people.

  2. Fun post! My parents both insisted they wanted to read my books, so with many disclaimers (because I write m/m erotic romance) I gave 'em some books. Mom can't believe anyone would read books like mine (although she's "met some gay people and they were very nice"). Dad just got his a couple of days ago. Dad is also a tree-hugger Anglican minister. I'm waiting to see how that shakes out.

  3. Heh - I suspect I'm going to have a very similar post come Thursday. >_<

  4. This topic has really got me thinking.
    My mum frequently makes me want to shout frantically, 'La, la, la...I can't hear you!'.It never occurs to her that there are some things (perhaps MANY things) a daughter doesn't want to know about their parents/other relatives/passing acquaintances etc, etc...
    I never have this problem with my Dad and he and I share reading material, much of which is PNR or UF and contains sex scenes of varying intensity. I did warn him about the sheer volume and visceral nature of the sexual content of the first J R Ward book he picked up off my shelf, he simply grinned and said, ‘Well that sounds right up my street!’.
    I honestly don't know what either of them would think if I presented them with a sex scene I had written but I would guess that as long as it was well written and in context they both would be more impressed than embarrassed? I genuinely hope to find out one day!

  5. My parents: Nope. No Way! Never!
    My grandmother however would have been another story. She would probably really have enjoyed the book.

  6. LOL, Jeffe, I reckon I'll keep 'em.

    Zomg, KC, I'm dyin' to know how your dad reacts too! Three cheers for the supportive parents through, right? Even if it does make family dinner a little awkward. :D

    Allison, how did your dad respond to BoD?

    Cuttlefish, I love that answer from your dad. Good luck with your publishing quest!

    Sullivan, ya know. I think my grandmothers might have been a bit like yours!

  7. I wouldn't bother sending Mom an erotic novel. We've talked about sex scenes in books before and her whole attitude about them is 'meh'. She reads a ton (literally) of romance novels every year and she flips past the racy stuff. If it gets too racy, she puts the book down and starts another one.