You Might Be Done with a Series If

How do you know when a series should have ended? See Word-Whore Jeffe's top 10 list from Sunday.

 

What? That's not enough? Okay. Okay. Slave drivers.

 

You need only look to comic books to understand why never-ending series can be a bad idea. Borrowing from Jeffe's top 10 list format, here's my addition to the "You might be done with a series if" list:

 

1. You've turned every last character into a ninja. (This happened. Xmen, 1980s. No. I won't name the writer.)

2. You've killed your main character. Again.

3. OR - your mc has gone totally insane, become catatonic, or is otherwise wandering in the wilderness of serious mental illness AGAIN. But never fear dear reader, in the next installment, the mc will pull him or herself up by the boot straps and get back to kicking bad guy fanny like nothing ever happened! (Those of us who've done mental illness and needed therapy to feel normal again will hunt you down and slap you into next week if you do this.)

4. You blew up the planet.

5. You keep changing the damned rules. (No, I wasn't bummed about Disney buying out Lucas, why do you ask?)

6. You decide on a reboot and you've lost count of which reboot this one is.

7. Your main character is on a first name basis with all the demons of hell because he/she ends up there so often, but isn't a demon him/herself.

8. Nobody actually does any lasting damage - physical or psychological - to your main or any of his/her besties.

9. Your hero/heroine says 'I'm smart!', other characters say 'that mc! So bright!' and then said mc goes out and repeatedly does stupid stuff. (Yeah, you all know exactly what I'm talking about here. No. I won't name the writer. But yes. Novel turned comic.)

10. You claim that every story that came before THIS one was just a dream.

 

Not on the list but guaranteed to make me toss a book against a wall? Creating a character that goes against type (in the case I'm thinking of, a kid whose super power was linguistic, not beating the crap out of anybody) and who is therefore utterly unique and then killing that character off because dealing with the implications of his uniqueness are inconvenient. I'm still bitter about that one and not just because I had a crush on this fictional character. I couldn't think of a way to put that in my 'you might be done if' list.

 

What else? No way have our combined lists this week managed to capture all of the shark-jumping glory of series the world over. Conversely, what series do you think HAVEN'T jumped the shark? And what do you think makes those successful series work?

VOTE ... Then Read About BaZombie Series

All US Citizens Age 18 and Older:

I cannot stress enough the importance of voting. Whatever your political stance, whatever your important issues -- GO VOTE. The Electoral College may decide who is president, but they don't decide your congressman and they don't decide your local ballot issues.

Okay, now that you're rockin' that swanky "I Voted" sticker, we can discuss:

BaZombie Series

Those of you who follow me on Twitter (@kakrantz) or on Facebook (also kakrantz, go figure) know my delicious solitude was shattered this past week by the invasion of the #weeniece. For whatever neuron-misfiring reason, the #weeniece insists on adding "Ba" in front of the word "Zombies." She's done it for the past three years. It's destined to become one of those words. You know, the kind of word you know you know but whenever you try to speak it your tongue forms some bastardization of it? Naturally, I find this inordinately entertaining.

Twice so since this week is all about Signs a Series Needs to End

Thank gods blogging for the Word Whores isn't a competitive sport, 'cause I'd have to concede defeat to Jeffe's humorous Sunday Top 10 List.

In my infinite pre-published wisdom, ~cough, hack, wheeze~ I have to say James nailed the key to continuing a successful series in yesterday's post:

"It will be natural for me to write it [Book 4] because he [Deacon] is in the midst of his character arc. I know where his arc is going and what I am going to do to get him there."

I'm really looking forward to Linda's post tomorrow, since Book SIX in her Persephone Alcmedi series hits shelves in January. I'm dying to know if there's a planned end to the series or if 'Seph is on a continual journey. Will she outlive Harry Dresden and Stephanie Plum? Can 'Seph make it to Book 21 before Johnny turns her into Kibbles & Bits? Could Linda stand to be on speaking terms with 'Seph for decades upon decades? Inquiring minds want to know: what is the strategy to a successful open-ened series? Gimme a clue, pleeeeease.

My Virgo-Brain can't cope without a PLAN for everything.

Yes, yes, darling readers, I am the sort of OCD Completest who James mentioned. I know exactly where my stories are going before I start Chapter One: Book One and how many books it'll take to reach "The End End." That said, I haven't had a publisher wave a big ol' check in front of my nose and say "if you write more, we'll pay you more...lots more." I admit, I have my price. I know it down to the last penny, blade, and stone. Could I still work with a character I've come to hate? For the right price? Sure. I'd probably have to drink more, but hey, those fancy checks could buy a new liver. Would I still write those gabillion other stories rattling around in my head? Erm, I'd probably have to thin them back to a few dozen. For now, I'd best contain my visions of an unending future to one book that will sell.

BUT ...

You know which series lived too long? Stop, I'm not going to snark on other novelists. I am going to point fingers at TV shows/franchises that just wouldn't die (sorry, script-writers).

Top 10 BaZombie Series:

1. Every daytime Soap Opera ever
2. Power Rangers
3. Survivor
4. Bones
5. WWE anything
6. ER
7. Law & Order
8. Psych
9. Smallville
10. Star Trek: The Infinite Spin-Off

I know, I know, the last one probably forces me to turn in my SciFi fangirl card, but really ... 

Does a BaZombie TV series leap to your mind, dear reader?  Do share!

Ten Warning Signs that a Series Needs to End Already

Good morning Word-Whoredom! I'm writing this from gloomy Toronto, where I've been attending the World Fantasy Convention, with sister whores Allison Pang and Linda Robertson. In a most-convenient stroke of serendipity, Ellora's Cave just happened to have a booth going at the Everything to do with Sex Show downtown. Last night I went and signed a bunch of cover flats for Feeding the Vampire and Hunting the Siren. Wild, enthusiastic and occasionally drunken readers. Total antithesis to the WFC crowd.

Both have been great experiences.

This week's theme is signs a series needs to end. Because I'm running a little low on time, I'm going for bullet points on this one.

Signs a Series Needs To End

1. Your heroine is running out of strange, new and exotic creatures to do the nasty with.

2. Your fans fondly recall Book 10 as the last one that made any sense at all.

3. You're having trouble maintaining a believable love triangle because you can't find a nursing home that allows co-habitation.

4. You've run out of additional super-powers to grant your heroine.

5. If, after eight books, your characters have still not reached the destination they set out for in
Book 1.

6. You've publicly announced that you were done writing the series three books ago, but couldn't resist the money the publisher offered.

7. You're now writing about the continuing exploits of your original heroine's great-grandchildren.

8. The original author's name no longer appears anywhere on the cover.

9. You're less concerned with whether your heroine is becoming a monster than in finding any human qualities at all.

10. If your series is recognized by anyone reading this list.

Why yes - I do plan to revisit this list throughout my writing career!