Fashion is forever pushing the limits of "zomg, how much did they snort when they designed that?" We all know couture is French for "I played sci-fi barbies today." I expect cray-cray on runway. I don't expect it to stumble down Main Street a few years later. So, in the spirit of Back to School, Autumn Wardrobe Update, and Classics Are Classics For A Reason, here are my Top 5 Main Street Fashion Deal-Breakers for 2011:
4. Micro-Skirts & Tunics as Dresses: If your bare ass will touch the seat when you sit, you need a pair of leggings...or a longer skirt. If you jiggle when you wiggle opt for the latter, preferably closer to your knees.
3. Jumpsuits / Rompers: If you like to floss the camel when you bend over, you might as well sign up for the William Wallace Special. Gods help you if there's a line for the ladies' room, or a hot dude trying to check out your backside. Yes, yes those things do make you look like you took a dump in your diaper.2. Skinny-Leg Jeans: If you are built are like woman, not a 9 year old boy, put these back on the shelf. You look like a sausage exploding from its casing.
Those, my dear readers, are my Top 5 Fashion Deal-Breakers for this lovely September 2011. What sort of "fashionable" wardrobe disasters have you seen lately? Care to confess to which ones you've succumbed?
